Tuesday, 13 March 2018

Exhausting Myself with Worry

I am exhausted. Not physically, as if I've been running or similar. I mean mentally. I am tired out. I'm not sure why. Perhaps it was just the slog of uni work today, but I can't say for sure.

I keep worrying about things. Bad things. Like being involved in a car accident, or being raped, or similar things like that. My brain sometimes gets into a rut like this. I start thinking about the "what if's", and it spirals into me being unable to think about anything else. I feel like it could be a result of anxiety, but again, I'm not sure.

Seems I can't be sure of anything tonight.

I only have an hour-long lecture tomorrow, so perhaps it'll give my brain a break so that I can calm down. Or maybe I'll be feeling better tomorrow morning after I wake up.

I hate that this just sounds like me complaining. I hate that I sound so pathetic that I can't even deal with something as small as an irrational fear, that I can't just get on with my life like anyone else can.

This frankly just sounds like I'm throwing a pity party. I'm signing off for the night.

~Silently Aching

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